Eternal Bonds

Eternal Bonds

Written by Chris Manheim
Directed by Mark Beesley

Episode synopsis:
Segment one: Xena, Gabrielle, and Eve are being attacked by the gods. They are chased by storms, lightning, fire, and tornados. They save themselves by ducking into a cave, where Joxer and three magi are waiting for them. The magi ask permission to present gifts, but Xena smells a trap. Things get nasty as the magi pull out weapons.
Segment two: A battle ensues, during which Joxer is wounded. The magi were sent by the priests of three different temples, representatives of Artemis, Poseidon, and Apollo. Xena realizes that Joxer was poisoned by the sword of Apollo's follower. She tells Gabrielle to escort Joxer to the mandrake tree at the north end of the valley for the antidote. The priests who had sent the assassins realize their plan failed, so they all swear to commit all of their forces to tracking down and killing Xena and her "spawn." Gabrielle discovers a red line moving up Joxers arm, confirming that he has been poisoned. Someone sneaks up on Xena as she breastfeeds.
Segment three: Xena fights off a bunch of warriors without ever putting down Eve. Ares tries to convince Xena that he wants to fight beside her in his dying days. Later that night, Xena has a dream where Ares saves Eve, and they end up in a passionate kiss. Gabrielle and Joxer encounter the priests and their warriors.
Segment four: Gabrielle and Joxer are spared because they claim to be pilgrims seeking Artemis' temple. Joxer is getting seriously ill, falling off of his horse and wandering in and out of consciousness. Xena sets up false trails to the south and eventually heads north towards the tree. She arrives there before anyone else, and from above spots armies moving onto the field. Ares appears again, and she learns that all of his sweet talk is because he wants to sire a child with her to continue his line.
Segment five: Joxer becomes so sick he is no longer able to travel. Gabrielle signals Xena using a parchment of hers as a kite. Xena arrives, but so don't the three armies. As they attack, Ares freezes the army, offering once more to have a child with her. She of course refuses. The battle continues. Xena kills the three priests with her chakram, and the armies run away, leaderless. Xena gives Joxer the antidote. He quickly recovers. All is well.

Disclaimer: Ares' virility was harmed during the production of this motion picture.

Moments Of Subtext:
Gabrielle whines about taking Joxer to the tree, alone. "Joxer, I'm taking you to the mandrake tree and that leaves Xena and Eve alone, okay? It's making me nervous."
Later: "It's just hard knowing that the people I love are in danger and I'm not there."
"You're talking about Xena, right? I'm sure she can handle herself."
"It doesn't mean I don't want to be there..."
When Ares and Xena are talking, Xena lists his "coming on" to her best friend as a reason for hating him.
Xena becomes physically ill when she remembers her naughty dream with Ares.

Commentary:
Gabrielle begins the episode by saying "The gods are throwing everything they've got at us." Now, am I the only person finding it difficult to get a grasp of just exactly what gods are and aren't capable of? I mean, if all the gods have gotten together to destroy Xena and her child in order to save their own lives, and the worst they can come up with is a storm, doesn't that seem kinda...sad? They avoid being slaughtered by the wrath of the gods by hiding in a cave!
Now the whole premise of this episode is that Xena and Gabrielle must split up so that Gabrielle can go save Joxer's life. Why? Why split up? They never bother to explain that. All Xena does while they are gone is breastfeed Eve and lay down a few false trails. And she STILL manages to beat them to the tree anyways. The armies do, too. Why didn't they all stay together in the first place?
Xena does an awful lot of fighting with an infant in her arms. This is just plain stupid. It is especially stupid when she is being attacked by THREE armies. How can three armies attack two women, and still manage to attack one at a time? This must be a very organized attack. So organized, in fact, that when the three leaders are killed, everybody else runs away. Why do they run away? Explain this to me. These are all religious armies who are fighting to save the lives of their gods. Yet they give up when three of them get hurt.
Now, I don't know much about the physics of freezing time. But my common sense tells me that if you freeze time and are able to look at all the frozen people, they will NOT have motion blur. But as I said, what do I know?